
Holiday Hand Humper: 2020 Edition
Happy holidays, loser! It may be 2020, the worst year on record, but it doesn't compare to the fact that YOU'RE the worst. There will be no gifts under your tree. You won't be getting any calls or invites for virtual visits. You're going to be left all alone just like you were last year... and the year before that... AND THE YEAR BEFORE THAT. Basically what I'm trying to say is Christmas 2020 won't be any different for you. That's really sad. Everyone is adjusting to be socially distant, yet there was no adjustment needed on your end because... you're a fucking loser! You were socially distant to begin with! It's time to hump your hand to my humiliation and accept the fact that the "new normal" IS your "normal normal"... PATHETIC.
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