
MVP to Blob Slob (WMV)
Our class reunion is coming up, my love. It’s hard not to imagine the looks on their faces if they saw you now. Once the MVP, the golden star of the team, now this massive, blobby wreck of a man who screams lack of willpower, overindulgence, and laziness. They’ll take in the sweat-soaked shirt clinging to your big, blubbery body, the crumbs and stains marking every meal you’ve inhaled without a second thought. Those too-tight, overstretched sweatpants haven’t been changed in weeks, have they? And those bottles—ugh, filled with your own urine because even waddling to the bathroom feels like too much effort. You’ve gone beyond just being a greedy pig; you’ve spiraled out of control and become a complete and utter slob.
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