Kendall's Loser
I have a great life. I live in a beautiful house in an amazing city. I have money, a sexy car, and a wardrobe worth more than your house. I go out with gorgeous, successful men. In fact, I'm going out with two tonight. You, however... you have no friends. You have no social life. You're ugly, completely devoid of charm and personality, and you have no dating life to speak of. You'll be staying home alone tonight, jerking off to me and fantasizing about MY perfect life. It must REALLY suck to be you. I laugh at you losers every day, and relish in my fantastic life even more for it.
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