KAZOO CRUCIFIED
Watch closely, pay piggy. This is your new religion.
And I’m the only god you’ll ever need.
My ass sways slow, mind melting — a sacred rhythm you weren’t ready for.
No hands. No mercy. Just worship.
Every bounce is a prayer.
Every jiggle — a command.
And you? You’re just my devoted little beta, begging to serve.
Church bells ring… and you contribute.
Again.
And again.
Mindlessly. Faithfully. Ruinously.
You’ll send it all — not because I ask…
But because you need to.
You’ll chant my name like a hymn.
You’ll drain your bank account like it’s communion.
And when you’re empty?
You’ll thank me like the good little pay piggy you are.
This isn’t just ass worship.
This is deification.
And baby…
You’re already on your knees.
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