She Pissed Me Off (standard definition)
Honestly, your wife is such a bitch. I know she is my friend and all, but she’s been on one lately. She thinks she is better than me. That’s a joke. I know you two are having relationship issues. She tells me *everything*. Yeah, she even told me how you can’t get it up.
Strange, your dick seems to work perfectly fine now. It must be this skimpy bikini on me. Or is it my plump juicy ass in your face? No matter, I am better than viagra.
I know exactly what you need. Next time you fuck her, think about my ass trying to squeeze into her yoga pants. I can’t believe she can fit these things, I can’t even get them over my big ass!
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