
Mean Girl Diapers You
You know the setup. Parents out, door locked behind them, and the sweet-voiced sitter who waved goodbye from the porch is suddenly somebody else entirely.
I take the remote. I take your allowance. I eat your pizza in front of you but if you're lucky I'll let you have the crusts. When you try to go potty, I even stand in the bathroom doorway with my arms folded and wait you out. Then the changing pad comes out, and the diaper goes on, and the rules get read aloud in a voice that has absolutely no interest in your opinion. Poor silly dumb little baby.
That's right sweetheart. We're playing by my rules tonight. How long can you stay dry when I'm making you drink cup after cup of milk and juice? Let's find out! By the time I'm filling your third cup of juice, you'll be pressing your thighs together and losing the game entirely. Oh well. Ready to play?
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