Wide Open Receiver: Homo-Encouraging Mindfuck
Straight guys watch sports, especially football! You get together with your bros, chug swill and eat nachos as you watch the most alpha males in the world run around in tights for 3 hours. You idolize their accomplishments, their feats of physical greatness, their perfect athletic bodies. Yeah, nothing gay to see here!
No heterosexual male should be that into any man. It's pretty clear what you want to be, what you fantasize about. You want to be out there on the field with all of those big sweaty muscled-up men getting grabbed, held, tackled, thrown, wrestling, and roughed up in worst way possible. The only question is what position would you play in this league? Do you want to be the quarterback so you can get sacked in the backfield? No, I bet you'd love to be a tight end! Or maybe what you dream of is being a wide receiver so you can catch all those deep balls!
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