Porn Is your Girlfriend
You've always dreamed of having a girlfriend of your very own, but somehow, you've always found yourself alone for some reason or another. Though I suppose it's hard to keep a girlfriend when you're, well, you.
Fret not, gooner!
You don't need a real girlfriend. Porn is your girlfriend now! You only need porn, you only want to pump your pornosexual cock to porn day and night. Porn will never leave you. Porn will always be there for you. Devote yourself to a life of gooning to porn, because it's the best a sexless loser like you could hope for! And, of course, no cumming. Porn has a very high stamina...in fact, you're going to replay this video again and again, goon to porn forever and ever and ever and ever...
The viewer is assumed to have a penis. Gender neutral.
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