Certified Loser
Stand up straight loser, aww, look at you trying so hard already, it's kind of cute.
L to the forehead, hold it right there for me. See, this basically sums up your whole personality in one letter, isn't that fun?
Now the middle finger, right at the camera, right at you, and I want you to notice I'm smiling the entire time I do it. That's the worst part isn't it? I don't even have to raise my voice, I don't have to be scary about it, I just get to look this pretty while I remind you exactly what you are.
Say it back to me loser, "I'm a certified loser," come on, say it with a smile like mine. Aww, you can't even do that right, can you?
I'm not mad at you, I'm not even yelling, I just think this is genuinely funny. You being this inadequate is adorable to me, and honestly? That's so much worse than if I actually cared enough to be angry.
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