Your Valentinesday meal
While other couples enjoy their romantic dinners, you are on the floor, your mouth open, waiting for your special Valentine's meal served directly from my ass. You are human waste, so it is only fitting that you consume the waste of a goddess; this is your identity and your only form of true intimacy. Love is for real humans, but for you, there are only disgusting tasks, and being my toilet is the highest honor you could ever achieve. You are not a person, but a functioning object, a utility, and you should be grateful for the purpose I give you. After your meal, I may even use you as my ashtray, because you are my everything receptacle, and your romantic evening is only just beginning.
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