Yabba Dabba Doo Farts
The Flintstones lived in the Stone Age. My gas belongs in the extinction events.
Dressed as Fred Flintstone for Halloween in my leopard print short dress, and baby, that dress was NOT made with my thick ass in mind. Every step I take, those cheeks pop out. Every time I bend over, the leopard fabric rides up and gives you the whole show.
And then I let the Stone Age loose. Big farts. Stinky farts. The kind that come rumbling out of me while my ass pops out of that tiny leopard dress with every rip. Prehistoric gas. The kind a caveman would've been scared of.
I turn, I bend, I shake it, and the dress gives up trying to cover me at all. Then another one rips out, loud and nasty, while my cheeks swallow that leopard print whole. This is what Bedrock would've smelled like if I lived there.
Yabba dabba doo baby. And yabba dabba don't breathe in.
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